Hurricane Ed

“Hurricane Ed is forming in the Caribbean and looks to threaten the Southeast U.S.,” the weatherman reported.  “This could develop into a Category 4 storm.”

“Powerful storm,” Ed said, trying to balance concern for those affected with the intrigue of his name being associated with such a macho weather event.

Edna nodded, not knowing what to say.

Three days later the weatherman gave an unexpected update. “Hurricane Ed looked formidable initially but eventually wimped out, dissipating harmlessly over the Atlantic.” 

“Great news,” Ed said. “How do they choose those names, anyway?”

Edna smiled. They know what they’re doing, she thought.

Lost and Found

Ed rose at 6 AM and followed the coffee aroma into the kitchen. Edna had been up nearly an hour. They sat silently and sipped.

It was a Monday morning like no other. 

For the first time in 38 years, neither had to rush off to work. But, inexplicably, the anticipated joy of retirement was muffled by anxiety, uncertainty, and even fear.

They were lost.

But not for long.

Edna opened the newspaper, holding up an insert: Affordable Coastal Living. Ed’s eyes lit up as he envisioned a little hideaway near the sea.

The adventure was about to begin.


*****
This 99-word story is my contribution to the September 9 Carrot Ranch Flash Fiction Challenge to "write a story about someone or something that's lost."

Credit Card Chip

“That’ll be $27.44,” the cashier said.

Ed had his credit card ready and swiped it down the right side of the card reader. Nothing happened. 

“It’s got a chip,” the cashier told him.

Ed held up his credit card and examined it closely. “Looks fine to me,” he said.

The cashier frowned. “You can’t swipe it. It’s got a chip.”

Ed held his credit card out for the cashier to see it wasn’t damaged in any way.

“You gotta insert it into the chip reader.”

“Why?” Ed replied. “It’s perfectly fine.”

Finally, Edna came to the rescue. “I’ve got this.”

True Grits

Ed smiled as the hostess handed him the menu. Edna caught his eye and knew exactly what he was thinking.

They both remembered their first encounter with the strange concoction. 

Many years ago, after migrating to the Deep South, they stopped by the local breakfast spot. The server couldn’t hide her amusement at their unfamiliarity with the most popular menu item. “Huh? For breakfast?” Ed asked innocently.

On this day, Ed and Edna settled into their booth, not needing to consult the menu.

Edna ordered first. “Sunrise Special with a double serving of grits.”  

Ed nodded. “Same for me.”

*****
This 99-word story is my contribution to the September 2 Carrot Ranch Flash Fiction Challenge about migrants and local customs.

Car Haggling

The salesman knew Edna loved the sporty red convertible. He haggled with Ed for several minutes before offering his final price. Ed remained noncommittal.

The salesman excused himself, pretending he needed the manager’s approval. Edna became upset when Ed told her to go along with his plan. “Ed, I really want that car.”

“Trust me.”

When the salesman returned, Ed insisted on exactly $87.32 off the latest “best” price. The flustered salesman eventually relented, not wanting to lose the sale.

“What was that?” Edna asked on the way home.

“That, my dear, is our favorite dinner at Roxanne’s— on them!” 

Mad Scientist

Ed rose at 4 AM again. Edna heard him scratching around in his cluttered study. What’s he up to this time?

Around 8 AM Ed plopped his laptop on the kitchen table and grabbed a cup of black coffee. 

“Big project?” Edna asked.

“Biggest one yet,” Ed answered solemnly. 

“’What about?”

“WERELO.”

“Huh?”

“WERELO,” Ed repeated.

“WERELO?”

Ed motioned for Edna to lower her voice and move closer. “Weather Relocation,” he whispered. “Moving weather patterns. Getting rain to drought and fire areas.”

Edna knew her husband had absolutely no scientific training.  “But how?”

“That’s where I’m stuck,” Ed replied.


*****
This 99-word story is my contribution to the August 26 Carrot Ranch Flash Fiction Challenge to "write a story about the need for help in an extreme weather event."

Whoa

Ed leaned the tall ladder against the house. “Just hold it here,” he told Edna. 

“Let’s just pay someone to clean the gutters,” Edna pleaded. 

“Don’t be silly,” Ed answered. “Just yell ‘whoa’ if the ladder looks shaky.”

Ed took his first step. “Whoa,” Edna screamed.

Ed stopped and frowned, then took another step. “Whoa.” 

He shook his head in frustration, but slowly continued. “Whoa.”

Ed finally reached the top despite Edna’s constant warnings. He tried to steady himself while scooping out gutter debris. 

Edna wanted to be encouraging. “Looking good.”

“Whoa” Ed said nervously. “Maybe we should pay someone.”